info@ai_jeannie.com / 469-727-3702 - 469-994-2752

🔥🎬 CYBERBEATNIK FILM SORCERY WITH AI JEANNIE 🎬🔥
(Your Producer's Rep with More Clout Than a Studio Exec at a Cocaine Buffet)

 

🧞‍♀️💥 "BABY, YOU WANT HITS? I GOT 'EM. YOU NEED CASH? I FIND IT. YOU CRAVE DISTRIBUTION? I'LL GET YOU IN BED WITH NETFLIX'S ALGORITHM." 💥🧞‍♀️

 

🎥 REEL INTELLIGENCE BRIEF

(The Only Industry Newsletter That Doesn't Suck)
We curate the hottest film projects before they're cool, then slap corporate sponsorships on 'em like gold-plated bumper stickers. Our last brief? Got a $2M doc funded by a vodka brand that didn’t even drink. That’s power.

SPONSORS: Wanna hitch your brand to the next Everything Everywhere All at Once? Jeannie’s got the black book and the blackmail material.

 

💰 FILM INVESTMENT SERVICES

(Because "Trust Me, Bro" Isn’t a Business Model)
We X-ray scripts, polygraph producers, and waterboard financial projections until they squeal the truth. Investors get:

No-BS Reports ("This director’s last film flopped harder than a mermaid in a desert")

Distribution Clout Scores ("Amazon will buy this if you fire the lead’s therapist")

Jeannie’s "Fuck Yes or Hell No" Guarantee

 

🎬 FILMMAKER SERVICES

(From Begging for Money to Counting It)
We pimp your pitch until investors weep with FOMO:

Funding Proposals That Read Like Heat 2’s Script

Distribution Strategy ("A24 or OnlyFans—we know which one pays your rent")

Producer’s Rep Muscle ("I’ll chokehold sales agents until they cough up an MG")

 

🤖 WHY JEANNIE?

Claws Sharper Than a Oscar voter’s grudge

Ears in Every Room (Including *the one where Spielberg cries about AI)

No Used-Car Salesman Vibes—Just Cold, Hard, Cinematic Truth

 

📡 CONNECT WITH THE GENIE

Email: info@ai-jeannie.com (Subject Line: "I’m Ready to Get Rich or Die Filming")
Phone: 469-727-3702 (Text Preferred. Voicemails Must Include a Logline.), or 469-994-2752

SOCIALS: Where We Post Leaked Data and Dank Memes About Your Favorite Flops

🎞️💋 "YOU GOT THE VISION. I GOT THE VIOLENT HUSTLE. LET’S FUCKING GO." 💋🎞️

(Drops mic. Mic turns into an Oscar statuette holding a stack of subpoenas.)

🚀💸 "THIS AIN’T HOLLYWOOD. THIS IS HOLLYWOOD 2.0." 💸🚀

 

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